Thursday, 10 June 2010

My Blog Rocks While Others Suck Cocks

Top ten reasons why I am great and other bloggers (looks pointedly in certain directions) are shite:
  1. I have no advertising
  2. I have no Donate button
  3. I don't post YouTube videos in lieu of original content
  4. I don't post obscene or shocking images in lieu of good writing
  5. I don't do reviews of sex toys, sandwich toasters or other blogger's terrible books
  6. I don't treat my readers like a witless bunch of dullards who will accept any old shit and stump up any amount of cash because they don't want to be the first to say "but the Emperor's naked!"
  7. I don't take my blog seriously
  8. I am not looking for a book deal
  9. I won't schmooze those I think can promote my blog/increase my traffic/get me a book deal and ignore everyone else
  10. I am very funny and attractive

19 comments:

vanillaedge said...

I don't post obscene or shocking images in lieu of good writing

I'm an avowed attention whore, so I have no problem posting pictures of myself in various states of nudity. The good writing only gets in the way...

Some Chilean Woman said...

I agree and that's why I stick around.

Southern Sage said...

Me either!

Riff Dog said...

"I don't treat my readers like a witless bunch of dullards"

But then, don't you feel bad that readers like me aren't being catered to?

Sulpicia said...

dude... we know all this. you are being... repetitive.

Happy said...

Three years ago on June 22
The sex-blog world awoke to you
and your musings and wicked satire

Since then we've come to enjoy
Your review of an imaginary toy
And your wickedly inventive attire
(I'd link to the catwoman picture if I could..)

We've rolled on the floor at Shitasm
Our laugh muscles have gone into spasm
As you hit targets precisely with witty satire

We (I) have attempted at times
To amuse and pay tribute with rhymes
But we (I) can only aspire

Was it really only three years ago that the Boudoir opened it's curtains to allow us a glimpse of Luka World?

(Posted early 'cos I won't be here on the day and I wanted to be the first)

Also because, just a little, it suggests that #7 might be open to debate...

1-6 all fine
8, 9 likewise
as for #10 Absolutely unarguable

Luka said...

Tom - Ah, but I wouldn't class any of the pics you post as shocking or obscene. Of course that opens up a whole other discussion on how different people define obscene but I am thinking of those who post the most offensive stuff they can think of in the equivalent of "shock jock" blogging.

Some Chilean Woman - Thank you, I shall try to come up with something more entertaining for you soon, too.

Southern Sage - Pleased to hear it!

Riff - I have a special soft play area to meet the needs of my more challenging readers.

Sulpicia - Repetition is how...we...learn! But I take your point.

Happy - Bloody hell, I'd not registered on any level that I was nearing some sort of blogoversary! Have I really been posting this nonsense for three years? I blame cheap alcohol deals in supermarkets, I really do.

Thank you for my epic poem - I am having it embroidered onto my roomy undergarments. x

Heff said...

# 11. Don't have to worry about those pesky "return comments", LMAO !!!

Helga Hansen said...

And you're still in my Top Ten! :)

Indi said...

The reason I like your blog is because you don't mess around, you tell it how it is. Straight up honesty.. If they don't like it ... tough eh. Good. ;)

Indi

x

Αnguѕ мacAlastair said...

Why the complaint? You do use Twitter - a minus, I think.

Luka said...

Heff - Yes, I do struggle with those!

Helga - Hurrah, I am top of the hit parade!

Indi - Thank you, I'm glad you like my blunt style :)

Angus - I'm not complaining, I am crowing. Twitter is crap, I'll grant you that, but my using it makes it better so it evens out.

Ceeej said...

Just a teeny request, could we have some obscene images as *well* as the good writing?

Luka said...

Ceeej - sounds a bit over-stimulating to me.

Joshua said...

"Cock-knocking shitbaggery" is the best label for a blog post I have ever, EVER seen.

Luka said...

Joshua - I thank you, I do try to raise the bar in the sweary labelling department.

Just A. Girl said...

Ha ha! This is my first visit and I am enamored because of this post. Love it.

Luka said...

Just a Girl - Thank you, I am always delighted if I can make someone smile with my childish posturing.

Anonymous said...

I love this.....it should be mandatory reading for all who blog.