Some kinks I just don't get. Some are the big obvious ones like shagging donkeys, pooing on glass topped coffee tables or rubbing your parts on a splintery fence.
Others are more low key and, apparently, more commonly shared turn-ons, from having your arse spanked until it goes purple to orgasm denial and chastity.
Well, actually I do get the spanking thing. I understand the pleasure/pain combination even though I cannot receive pain in a sexual situation myself. Well, I can but I tend to lash out in retaliation which spoils the moment. The stimulus may be all in play but my response is sadly all too real and on the violent side. Still, you poke the hornet's nest (not a euphemism, but it could be) and what do you expect?
The orgasm denial and chastity thing has always been a puzzler for me. I enjoy reading Tom Allen's Edge of Vanilla and while I have learned much from his honest and engaging posts it is still an alien landscape for a greedy hedonist such as myself. Delayed gratification? You might as well suggest I save some chocolate for later.
Then I read this post over on Monmouth's blog. If you can't be arsed to follow the link it's about a girl on the blob who, rather than wanting nothing more than to spend an hour curled up on the sofa with a hot water bottle, eating Maltesers while wearing a dressing gown and thick, warm men's socks, yearns to be on her knees and used as an oral wanking aid.
I'm not even sure if she gets a cushion to kneel on. My knees would be killing me after a few minutes and I'd have to use the stiffy in question for leverage back up and then retire to the chaise longue.
I am entirely baffled as to what's in this scenario for the lady. Other than a mouthful of spunk and, to be honest, I've come to want more from life. Judging by the comments though many women would like nothing more than to have their pulsating ladyparts ignored and untouched as they gamely suck and gag, getting walloped intermittently in the chin by some sweaty balls. Whilst menstruating, I hasten to add, a time more traditionally associated with intense bouts of stroppiness and a less than altruistic mindset.
Is this really a popular scenario or has it just gone through the 70% bullshit enhancement feature I belive is built into most sexual online interactions? An unfeasibly large number of men on adult dating sites, for example, claim to adore cunnilingus and profess to love going down for hours. Conversely, do a comparable number of women online claim to love sucking cock with no pressure to have to find the clitoris for reciprocal pleasure?
What are your thoughts?