I wasn't wearing stockings and ridiculously sexy high heeled boots. I had not meticulously bathed, shaved and moisturised. I had stubbly bits and wobbly bits. I had jeans, a jumper and socks.
When he embraced me he put his face in my hair, nuzzling my neck, just below my ear. He told me I smelled amazing and bit me, hard enough to raise goosebumps along my arm but not quite hard enough to leave a mark. "Close the door," I murmured. "The dog is looking at me."
This is my really real sexy sex. I don't have carefully cropped pictures to post, showing my nylon-clad legs in the air. I don't even have carelessly cropped pictures showing my jeans pooled around my ankles as I try to kick both them and my socks off simultaneously. Or my jumper caught halfway over my head. Or that erotic moment where you have to throw the cat off the bed and then brush the mud off the duvet. Or that special post-orgasmic pass-the-bog-roll snapshot. I have no pictures of these, partly because I have doubts they will win me a Fleshbot, but mostly because I can't be arsed to waste my precious shagging time looking for the camera. (It's never to hand, and when you do track it down the batteries are inevitably flat, and when you eventually find the remote control and raid it for a couple of AAs it's time to go to work and the opportunity is lost.)
I suppose what I am saying is that while it is fun to dress up and prepare, the reality is that many of my best experiences are those that are unexpected, unplanned for. The arms enfolding me from behind as I stand at the kitchen sink, the kisses on the back of the neck. The sleepy surprise of the half-awake lovemaking that occurs on those rare occasions when the stars and your pyjamas are in alignment. The slow-dawning joy of suddenly realising everyone else in the house has fucked off out for a bit and you can be rude on the sofa for a change. These moments have a tendancy to occur when one isn't wearing a corset and fishnets.
I am musing now on what eveyone else's really real sexy sex experiences are like. Have you been found irresistable whilst suffering from the flu, for example? Or been unexpectedly sauced up whilst gutting fish? Do tell.