Saturday, 20 December 2008

Tales of the Unexpected

I wasn't wearing stockings and ridiculously sexy high heeled boots. I had not meticulously bathed, shaved and moisturised. I had stubbly bits and wobbly bits. I had jeans, a jumper and socks.

When he embraced me he put his face in my hair, nuzzling my neck, just below my ear. He told me I smelled amazing and bit me, hard enough to raise goosebumps along my arm but not quite hard enough to leave a mark. "Close the door," I murmured. "The dog is looking at me."

This is my really real sexy sex. I don't have carefully cropped pictures to post, showing my nylon-clad legs in the air. I don't even have carelessly cropped pictures showing my jeans pooled around my ankles as I try to kick both them and my socks off simultaneously. Or my jumper caught halfway over my head. Or that erotic moment where you have to throw the cat off the bed and then brush the mud off the duvet. Or that special post-orgasmic pass-the-bog-roll snapshot. I have no pictures of these, partly because I have doubts they will win me a Fleshbot, but mostly because I can't be arsed to waste my precious shagging time looking for the camera. (It's never to hand, and when you do track it down the batteries are inevitably flat, and when you eventually find the remote control and raid it for a couple of AAs it's time to go to work and the opportunity is lost.)

I suppose what I am saying is that while it is fun to dress up and prepare, the reality is that many of my best experiences are those that are unexpected, unplanned for. The arms enfolding me from behind as I stand at the kitchen sink, the kisses on the back of the neck. The sleepy surprise of the half-awake lovemaking that occurs on those rare occasions when the stars and your pyjamas are in alignment. The slow-dawning joy of suddenly realising everyone else in the house has fucked off out for a bit and you can be rude on the sofa for a change. These moments have a tendancy to occur when one isn't wearing a corset and fishnets.

I am musing now on what eveyone else's really real sexy sex experiences are like. Have you been found irresistable whilst suffering from the flu, for example? Or been unexpectedly sauced up whilst gutting fish? Do tell.

7 comments:

daisyfae said...

this is lovely! i like to play dress up, but in fact some of the most fun is that "sneaky everyday" sex...

my friend and i were absolutely shagged out this week - agreed to take a night off. so we're drinking beer (out of bottles) in bed and talking. i had to start lecturing him on the brilliance of Billy Bragg when he came on my iPod (no, Billy Bragg hadn't actually "came" on my iPod). i climbed on top of my friend to talk to him face to face, and make my point...

most of the clothing stayed on... i'm not sure he took off his glasses. i'm pretty sure i held onto my beer for awhile. we laughed ourselves silly the entire time...

this is the stuff that makes you grin.

Some Chilean Woman said...

We were supposed to go see my grandma. I had my clothes on, make up on, I was even wearing my boots -I was ready to go. Until he started tickling me and messing up my hair. I wanted to dry hump him for some reason, but that didn't last long. My top was still on for it was very urgent and really that quick. We were late to grandma's.

Trixie said...

I'm normally too drunk to remember it....so imagine I look like those adverts where you ask yourself if you would go out looking the way you end up?

Luka said...

Daisyfae - that sounds like much more fun than the po-faced encounters most sex bloggers write so earnestly. The stuff that makes you grin is the stuff of real passion.

Some Chilean Woman - some things are definitely worth taking time out for. What excuse did you give grandma?

Trixie - heh, those adverts are great. I love the female one. Hasn't stopped me drinking though.

Old and past it said...

Spot on. And same applies to comments. Sadly, he can't remember the last really real sexy sex he enjoyed :( but vicarious really real sexy sex is better than none at all :)

Some Chilean Woman said...

Luka -I told gran we were late because the roads were slippery :)

Luka said...

Old and Past It - Vicarious really real sexy sex is lower in calories and free of mess too!

Some Chilean Woman - I like it!