Wednesday, 31 December 2008

Gratuitous Pussy Shots

"I know," I thought, "I can take a nice, saucily festive shot of myself, much like my Christmas Card one, and that'll do as my lazy-arsed last post of 2008".

This morning dawned foggy and frozen, however, and the thought of donning sheer stockings and a bit of lace was too much for this old trollop, so on went the thick, woolly tights instead.

Of course if you then get onto the bed and start flinging your legs about while wielding a mobile phone camera then you ought to expect company. Especially if that company is waiting for you to get on with cleaning out the litter tray and opening a tin of Whiskas (not necessarily in that order.) Despite my loving "bugger off out of it, you" he managed to get into every shot.


By the time he moved onto biting my shoes and digging his claws into my leg in a "use your opposable thumbs or the new tights get shredded" kind of way I accepted defeat and did his bidding. It was either that or run the risk of a punishment surprise in my sock drawer again. Here I am, great big arsey Luka, slave to a small furry feline. Any submissives out there who are in between relationships and missing some dominance in their lives, just get a cat. (NB. They are not for novices. Cats don't use safewords and no matter how much you cry out they will still happily run up your legs using only their claws in your bare flesh for leverage. And puke in your slippers for a laugh.)

Now that I have served the cat his lunch I am free to begin the New Year's Eve celebrations. I shall be staying in the warm and hoping my woolly tights don't discourage any potential saucing up when the clock strikes twelve. Maybe I should slip a bottle of bubbly down them, just to be on the safe side.

9 comments:

Some Chilean Woman said...

Don't blame that kitty for wanting to be so close to those sexy legs of yours.

¡Feliz Año Nuevo! Looking forward to a Barbed 2009.

Jackie Adshead said...

You can't beat pictures of a pussy laid out on the bed! Great photos, Luka. And it sounds like you're going to have a wonderful start to the new year with something large, fizzing and tasty down your tights at midnight! :)

Have a great one - and I look forward to reading more of your wise words in the new year!

Helga Hansen said...

What a purr-fect end to the year... and quite sensible too, with snazzy woolly tights!

Have a wonderful start to 2009, and give that gorgeous tom a stroke from me!

Freddy said...

I thought there'd be some rhyme
Or a picture with a caption (witty)
I guess there wasn't time
What with tights and the need to feed kitty

You know, we're not that fussy
About meter and scansion and that
But to fob us off with your pussy?
By which I mean, of course, the cat.

I'll end this now before it's too late
And wish you, Luka my dear
That the final night of 2008
Is a good one, oh and Happy New Year


PS - Love the tights!

Ro said...

Ahhhh, Luka, how wonderful that you managed to squeeze "pussy" photos in before the end of the year. To think that I missed the opportunity to exploit the corresponding "cock" pics.

I have to say that, demanding or not, that is certainly a delightful looker of a cat you have there and I'm pleased to learn that you fully understand the true relationship between the cat and its slave.

Happy 2009, ma'am :)

Carnalis said...

lovely pins .. and a route map too :)

Happy New Year darling! xx

Amorous Rocker said...

Lovely covered legs and such a pretty "pussy" you have there.

Happy New Year!

d2b said...

Oh, I also have an truly all-black cat like yours but he never wants to pose with me in the bed. Anyway - you have much nicer legs than me ;)

Happy Great New Year!

Luka said...

Some Chilean Woman - ah, to him my legs are merely a source of warmth and a means of transport to the nearest food bowl.

Jackie - thank you, it was fun but I am still trying to retrieve the cork.

Helga - he is gorgeous, isn't he? He smells inexplicably lovely too. Or maybe that's just in comparison to the dog.

Freddy - you are writing more poetry than I am these days! Hope 2009 is good to you, too.

Ro - I have never doubted the true nature of ownership in the cat/human relationship!

Carnalis - oh, you know the way by now!

Amorous Rocker - thank you kindly, and a Happy New Year to you, too!

d2b - ah, cats never want to do what you want them to, which is part of their charm. Happy 2009!