Sunday, 30 March 2008


His breath was hot and I delighted in the sensation of it stirring the tiny hairs on my neck as he whispered, urgently, against my skin:

"I can't move my arm."

"Oh, sorry!"

I shifted forward a little, releasing his arm from where it had been trapped between my back and the sofa.


"Oh yes," he murmured as the pins and needles subsided. He flexed his digits, experimentally. It was good movement. I liked it. I hoped he would flex them again, only nearer my bosoms.

"Now, where were we?" he smiled, as he leaned in close again.

"We were looking for the remote control for the TV. Then somehow we began canoodling. You know how I like a canoodle."

"I'm beginning to. Should we continue?"

"Please. Only this time, to avoid circulatory problems, I think you should put that hand here and this one here."

He flexed his digits, experimentally. The experiment was an unmitigated success. All the blood went to my bosoms.

"Are you smuggling peanuts in your bra?" he asked, feeling the hard nub pressing against his hand.

"I did have a packet of M&Ms earlier..." I mused.

"Well, I'd better investigate," he said.

He unbuttoned my fitted blouse with a swift dexterity. All the digit flexing was clearly paying off.

I shrugged the silky garment off my shoulders, revealing my black lacy bra, the dark fabric contrasting beautifully with the creamy skin of my full, rounded breasts. He gazed upon my d├ęcolletage, his eyes lingering on the pulse beating frantically at the base of my throat, betraying my desire.

"Oh, you're in trouble now." He fell upon me like a pre-menstrual woman upon a packet of chocolate hobnobs.

He briefly surfaced for air. There was a crumb on his lip. His tongue lazily retrieved it.

"You've got crumbs down your cleavage," he informed me.

"I know. I usually do. That's the problem with a big cleavage."

"I shall follow the trail and see where it leads me," he announced, heading back in. "Fuck me, it really was an M&M!" He held up the errant sweet for me to see. It was a red one. I like those.

"One day," I told him, "I took off my bra at bedtime and a cornflake fell out of it. It had been there since breakfast!"

"You are my very own pick and mix counter. I shall gorge myself upon you."

I sighed, happily. It was nice to have a man get there before the seagulls.

I shifted position.

"What's wrong?"

"It's this bloody thong," I explained, trying to tug it back out from where it had become uncomfortably wedged. "It's gone right up my - oh!"


"I think I've found the remote control."


Angela-la-la said...

Completely evocative and proper laugh out loud funny!

Walker said...


I got to remember to look for thte remote more often.

I have always said if you let the fingers do the walking then the lips could just park in your favorite spot ;)

Midnight said...

I'm a Thorntons or Green and Blacks man myself, you got any of those stashed away on your person?

Sulpicia said...


Freddy said...

You owe me for a new keyboard! I just spat coffee over the old one!

max said...

love it, love it and pray (for your sake)that they don't (do) continue to make the remote controllers smaller.

Melissaria said...

That's very, very funny. Have the same cleavage issues. The Husband thought all his Christmases had come at once the time I dropped some Branston Pickle down there, and had to send him in on a resuce mission - if I'd moved it would have smeared everywhere...

Globus said...

whenever globus is on your blog the boss appears screen-side, as if drawn by some invisible tractor beam, and leaves globus feeling like his timing's all shit - again.

Vi said...

With me, it's normally snot from sneezing I find in my cleavage!

Luka said...

Angela-la-la - I aim to please :)

Walker - heheh - I like that philosophy!

Midnight - I might have something but it may be a bit on the sticky side by now...

Sulpicia - happy sigh or wistful sigh?

Freddy - I do apologise. Have a muffin.

Max - hello! Quite, it's been bad enough with the mobile phone, but at least it vibrates.

Melissaria - ah, yes, condiments and sauces of all types end up squirting out of the sandwich and down the cleavage, don't they? It's a good job bosoms are wipe clean.

Globus - that must be most frustrating for you. Still, your timing seems ok at the moment...

Vi - that's somewhat harder to persuade someone to lick up!

Ms Robinson said...

LIfe affirming and breathtaking. If you read one blog post this year, make it this one.

Luka said...

Ms R - I think I shall enter it into Post of the Week, Sugasm, Fleshbot and the Reader's Digest letters page too.

EmmaK said...

Priceless! I never get food stuck in my bra because I hardly ever wear low cut tops. Would be intrigued to know if you really did find a remote in your thong and if so if you washed it before using it?

Anonymous said...

I like the red ones too :-)

Luka said...

Emma - wash the remote? That would invalidate the warranty!

Nurse Myra - where do you keep yours?

Anonymous Boxer said...

*sigh* Cleavage.

What's that like?


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Luka said...

Anonymous Boxer - crummy :)

Servidores - I will give you a muffin if you can tell me what my blog is about.