Thursday, 31 January 2008

Shitasm #9

Well done all you literate smut types, good to see my fave blog chums making the top 3 picks this week! (Because we really are this matey and close and you might even think I have had sex with one or two of them!)

(Insert pic of big breasted, slack jawed mouth-breather here)

The shittest of this weeks blogs by the bloggers who blog them. Highlighting the top 3 posts as chosen by Shitasm participants. Well, I say chosen. In reality so many submissions of samey crap come flooding into the Shitasm post box all we really do is scan the first line or two and then vote for our mates.

Want in Shitasm #10? Submit a link to your shittest post of the week using the comments box below. Please be sure to include "fuck" in your post title somewhere. This, and I can't stress this enough, is crucial to selection. Participants, repost the shit list within a week, to the annoyance of anyone looking for something that doesn't appear as an identical feature on every adult themed shit blog, and you’re all set.

This Week's Picks

The Fuck Hat

"'You know, this hat would look amazing if you wore it while you fucked me,' I said, rubbing my hungry cunt all over his trilby."

I Fucked a Lurker

"It is so tiresome being a quasi-blog-celebrity. If I let every millionaire playboy who contacts me spray his hot man fat up my nostrils I'd have real sinus problems."

I Have Done a Fuck!

"Oh, he have got a big cock and he have put it in me and I have done it lots and lots and lots and it is good and I am good at it and I have got a lovely arse and I have done an arse fuck too."


Freddy said...

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

I love it, all but especially illiterate slut.

I'm off to Ilkley Moor today, so I think I'll leave the trilby at home.

Ms Robinson said...

I love it more than that fucking sycophant Freddy.

In fact I am still laughing from the previous post and yes, the idea of 'illiterate slut' is too funny.

*tears in eyes*

Luka said...

Freddy - wear the bobble hat, you know what that does for me!

Ms R - as my Glorious Leader (you are still in power aren't you - we're not at the hitting-your-fallen-statue-with-a-slipper stage yet are we?) your supremacy in the loving it stakes was never in doubt.

bittersweet me said...

The last one reminds me of my toddler, yelling from his cot ... I have done a poo.

He is similarly proud.

Luka said...

Me - get him a laptop! x

having my cake said...

Godammit, stop stealing my ideas!

Ro said...

Funny! It'd be even funnier if it wasn't so true!

Right, I'm going to head off and check which category I've inadvertently slipped into ...

{leaves in haste}

Luka said...

Cake - I just can't help it, they're endemic!

Ro - hello! I have not noticed an abundance of posts with "fuck" in the title on your blog, so you're probably ok... Unless you start banging on about being literate and writing erotica for people who "think" (as opposed to just wanking themselves blind), in which case I shall lampoon you, mercilessly. :)

Ro said...

Hmmm ... it's tempting. After all, I've never been deemed worthy of being lampooned before!

But, no ... I hereby promise to do my very best to avoid being a pretentious git and to just write whatever it occurs to me to write without obsessing in public about the value of my art. And to avoid using the word "Fuck" in the titles.

Now you've got me wondering, though, whether I've ever written anything worth masturbating over ...

Luka said...

Ro - a lampooning from me can be a mutually satisfying experience if you simply open your mind to it...

(As for masturbatory material I shall have to go take an in depth look...)

JRM said...

Hmmm, I wonder if I put "fuck" in any title... I think I reserve it for liberal use within the posts rather than titles... LOL I cringe to think of the time my turn comes at your sharp fingertips!

Anonymous Boxer said...

Oh, I've missed you.

Globus said...

this is funny. globus approves of the expletion and derision, keep it up :-)

Midnight said...

I'd like to see one in the style of Dad's Army.

You know "those fuddy duddies don't like it up them Mr Mainwaring"

It was a class leader until Mrs Slocombe's pussy came along.

Luka said...

JRM - hello! I have a lot of affection for that which I lampoon a great deal of the time, so if I'm doing it right it shouldn't hurt. Much.

Anonymous Boxer - yay! Welcome back! You have likewise been sorely missed x

Globus - hello! I shall endeavour to keep it up for as long as humanly possible.

Midnight - oh, a bit of double entendre is always fun, and nobody did it like the Brits in 1970s comedy. I think there is also a niche for Carry On Sex Blogging. Hmmmm....