Thursday, 23 August 2007

Spicy HMT!

Continuing my kitchen-based HMT themes, and having explored the sensual delights of clingfilm and tin foil, I have now been inspired to investigate the spice rack.

Yes, ma belle muse has once more worked her magic, and I am left giddy with the possibilities of sticking new and wondrous culinary items into my various orifices.

The humble cucumber, a favourite of organic produce lovers for years, has been relegated back to the salad drawer. Now there's a new kid in town - the ginger root!

I scoured my kitchen cupboards, looking for anything ginger, so I could discover what this "figging" business is all about. All the cool kids are doing it.

Sadly I had no fresh ginger in the house. Damn.

Ok, what else was there? I unearthed this:

which has ginger in it, but I suspected it wasn't really up to the job.

I paused and pondered. Hmmmmm.... Spice.... Ginger... Ginger....Spice...
OK, perhaps not. Silly idea. She is so far up her own arse I am not sure she'd be ready to adventure up anyone elses. Though I am quite sure she would sting a bit.

No, I must have something in the back of the cupboard that would do the trick.

Aha! Could have been made for me! The Lazy Luka I'm-not-actually-gonna-stick-anything-stupid-up-my-arse option!

Happy Half Mental Thursday! More in depth thoughts on this subject matter to follow later!


Ms Robinson said...

Got an gingernut biscuits?

Amy said...

C'mon! Show us your tits!

*walks away pouting*

Anonymous Boxer said...

Is that "lazy" ginger? Why does that sound dirty?

n said...

Saw loads of ginger in my green grocers today. It was on special offer! Made me snigger and wonder if he had read the post, thinking that he might have a rush on.

Luka said...

Ms R - I can't reveal where they have gone but there are crumbs in my gusset. (Scratches)

Amy - tits are so last week. It's all anal adventures these days.

Anonymous Boxer - it is "Very Lazy Ginger". It sounds dirty because it is, the spicy little number.

N - that is the joy of sex blogging. You can never look at the fresh produce section in the same way again.

bittersweet me said...

i am visualizing 'lazy garlic' strung on string for a delightful anal love bead toy.

The Man With Secrets said...

I really don't see what the problem is here. Why, even Charles, our beloved future king, has extolled the virtues of sticking coffee up your bum, and has even called for it to be available on the NHS. I suspect it has to be organic, or free trade or something, I don't know - I did try asking in Starbucks, but the nice young lady didn't know. Called security, in fact. Not a nice company, I don't think.

Luka said...

Me - what a vivid (and disturbing) imagination you have!

Man - I am outraged on your behalf!