How pervy are you?
In these days of sex blogs and Cosmopolitan it's hard to know if you're still a bit kinky or now regarded as the norm. Simply answer the questions below to discover the inner you.
1. A friend of yours pops up in a chat window. They are definitely flirting with you. There have been "lol"s and winky smileys and everything. Do you:
A) Steer the conversation back onto safer territory. They are just a friend, after all.
B) Flirt right back, with lashings of innuendo and saucy repartee.
C) Immediately strip off, smear yourself with Nutella, switch on the webcam and wank yourself frenziedly whilst continuing to type with one finger to your msn buddy?
2. Sexy attire is:
A) Classic, well cut and figure flattering.
B) Tight and revealing.
C) A leather harness, fishnet stockings and a pony tail butt plug?
3. Your lover brings you breakfast in bed. Do you:
A) Snuggle up close as you share a croissant.
B) Lick jam from your lips alluringly with the promise of more oral delights to follow.
C) Rub butter all over your body and insert toastie soldiers into your marmite motorway whilst your lover drips hot egg yolk onto your nipples and takes photos?
4. When enjoying precious alone time and indulging your sensuous side you're most likely to be found:
A) Reading a passionate novel in an aromatherapy bath.
B) Indulging in some solo sex play with the stimulation of your choice.
C) Being broadcast over the internet via your webcam with a pair of used knickers on your head and a cucumber up your arse?
5. Completing this quiz made you feel:
A) That this was 2 minutes of your life you'd never get back.
B) Mildly amused.
C) The need to buy more cucumbers and rummage through the laundry basket?
So, how did you do?
Mostly As: You are not pervy. You are normal and wear sensible shoes and comfortable underwear.
Mostly Bs: You have pervy potential. If you'd like to develop your deviant side why not try inserting root vegetables into yourself and writing about it on your blog to get those creative juices flowing?
Mostly Cs: You are Practically Pervy in Every Way. You're probably performing some degrading lust-fuelled degenerate sex act as I type. I expect the evidence in my in box shortly.