Sunday, 22 July 2007

Condensed Blog #1

Some blog posts are just far, far too wordy for an incredibly busy and important person such as myself to be bothered with. My time is valuable and any post that involves having to scroll down more than a couple of times has to be pretty fucking amazing to hold my attention or be worth the energy expended by my poor, overworked finger.

And chances are that if the post title includes a Roman numeral, and is part eleven of an unending series of tedious, drawn out, wank fantasies masquerading as Proper Writing, it is probably not going to be worth the bother.

However, if you are still not convinced, as a public service, I am prepared to offer up a condensed version so you can decide if reading the entire post would be a wise investment of your time.

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Reprobate in a Tutu
The Nudie Ladies VIII, Chapter 18

There were all these nudie ladies, and I nobbed the lot of them. When I stopped nobbing them they got all lesbotic with each other before letting me nob them again.

It was great!

Log in tomorrow for the next enthralling chapter!

22 comments:

Anonymous Boxer said...

I feel I can handle the full version.

The Man With Secrets said...

See, you'd feel different about all this if someone wrote a fourteen part essay on how he'd imagine nobbing you ...

Ms Robinson said...

You are a bitch after my own heart.

Luka said...

Anonymous Boxer - good luck! Remember to pack warm clothing and a snack, in case you are trapped there longer than anticipated.

Man - hmmm....but I fail to see how "unimagineably lucky" can be stretched to fill a fourteen part essay, even by the wordiest of windbags.

Ms Robinson - it would appear to be so.

Freddy said...

lesbotic?
is that really a word?
and no, I'm not going to look it up because I can't be arsed.

I'm sure there are those who could stretch to fourteen parts on the subject of unimaginable luck...

Luka said...

Freddy - it is just as much a word as "lesbitious" which I could have also used in this context.

The Man With Secrets said...

"Lesbotic" is so a word. It's beautiful. And evocative. So there.

Luka said...

Man - indeed, it is the sound of angels, cumming.

logodisiac said...

You’ve got a point distinguishing wank fantasies from Proper Writing. What do you think is the difference?

having my cake said...

*realises some of her submissions may involve more than two downward scrolls*
*resolves to be less wordy in future*
*and include more lesbotics for freddy*

Luka said...

Logodisiac - I think the only real difference is that Proper Writing uses more words less crudely to express the same basic idea.

Having my Cake - and a "lesbitious" for me, please!

Freddy said...

I relented and googled the word - Man you are right, it does seem to be a real word, certainly amongst a certain group of internet dwellers anyway
"lesboticbooktalk: Lesbotic Book Talk - For Dykes discovering new books"

oh and from Page 2 of the 1040 results...
"Urban Dictionary: aubergine
an aubergine is a lesbotic sex toy. the aubergine pleased her.... tags aubergine aubergines sex toy lesbotic lesbians. by .... hm... in th lesbotic world ...
www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=aubergine - 20k -"

who'd have thought it eh?

The Man With Secrets said...

Freddy. You forget. I'm The Man. I know all.

Freddy said...

ahhh of course, that must be so hard though...

Luka said...

Man and Freddy - I think it's high time you both oiled up and wrestled out your diferences in front of a roaring log fire, Women in Love style.

me said...

Luka - are you selling tickets? it would be a crowd winner ...

Freddy said...

lmao - simmer down girls, it's not going to happen!

The Man With Secrets said...

Luka: Splendid idea. I bags be Ollie Reed.

Me: Fret not. No member of my seraglio will want for tickets.

Freddy: No? Shame.

Luka said...

Me - I wouldn't dream of selling tickets. Such an event should be given freely. Small donations can be made to cover any oil damage to my sheepskin rug.

Freddy - what am I to do with all this baby oil now?

Man - you are always Oliver Reed to me xx

Freddy said...

ahh luka luka
you KNOW what to do with the baby oil xx

biotch said...

The problem with what is passed off as writing, sorry, blogging, is that there is an incredible amount of shit posing as writing.

What you have done is select the best erotica blogger out there. I'm surprised you haven't added him to your boudoir browsing list, because some of the people you already have on it aren't half the writers that he is (and you think you're a bitch?)

Luka said...

Biotch - no, you think I'm a bitch, I think I am lovely.